This Valentine’s Day, Practice Unselfish Love
A few years ago, I was running late for an appointment. I stopped at a red light and the driver behind me began honking, waving his arms, and shouting words I couldn’t quite understand—but could imagine. My immediate reaction? Frustration. I wanted to tell him exactly why his behavior was unwarranted and wrong. Instead, I stared straight ahead, took a deep breath, and prayed. I immediately felt the Spirit within say: “Choose love.”
Moments like these remind me how hard it can be to show love when it’s undeserved or inconvenient. That experience stuck with me as a vivid reminder of how challenging—and crucial—it is to practice unselfish love even when seemingly undeserved.
The Biblical Call to Love in 1 Peter 4:7-8
As we think about Valentine’s Day and the true meaning of love, Peter’s words challenged me and reminded me of the urgency of this moment. I asked the Lord to help me demonstrate this deeper kind of love, “But the end and culmination of all things has now come near; keep sound minded and self-restrained and alert therefore for [the practice of] prayer. Above all things have intense and unfailing love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins,” (1 Peter 4:7-8 AMP).
Peter highlights two key actions for these times we live in: praying with a sound mind and showing a love that forgives. When we love this way, people will recognize a love beyond human possibility and feel the peace only Jesus offers. This doesn’t mean ignoring wrongs or pretending everything is fine; but instead choosing to extend grace and forgiveness even when someone doesn’t deserve it. This is the same love God shows us—a love that refuses to keep score of our mistakes and always seeks reconciliation.
How to Show Love That Covers Offenses
As Valentine’s Day approaches, it’s easy to focus only on romantic love, chocolates, and hearts. Instead, let’s focus on embodying 1 Peter 4:7-8 by practicing unselfish, grace-filled love with all we meet. Here are some easy ways to do this:
- Pause Before Reacting: When someone is unkind, take a deep breath and pray for wisdom. Respond instead of react. Even one small moment of silence is often enough to help us see a new perspective.
- Choose Grace over a Grudge: Let go of small offenses. Refuse to let them grow into bigger conflicts. Paul tells the Corinthians not to keep a record of wrongs (I Cor. 13:1). One of Reen’s favorite statements is, “It is what it is.” Instead of fixating on the problem, leave the past behind, accept what’s happened, and begin to think about ways to move forward.
- Look for Ways to Serve: Whether it’s your spouse, friend, or neighbor, find one tangible way to meet their needs this week. Aim to make them feel loved in the way they appreciate most! Check out Gary Chapman’s The 5 Love Languages to understand how each best receives love.
- Practice Gratitude: Instead of dwelling on someone’s shortcomings, thank God for their good qualities. The people closest to us can sometimes frustrate us the most, but consider making a list of what you love most about them and each time something proves frustrating, take a moment and thank God for their positive and cherished qualities.
When we choose love—even when it’s undeserved—we create opportunities for healing, connection, and the opportunity to reflect God’s grace. This Valentine’s Day, let’s take the time and exert the energy to demonstrate a love beyond measure, Christ’s unfailing love.
