Make Every Day Valentine’s Day

By Reen Waterman

I’ll be honest with you—I don’t come from a romantic family. My dad was not warm, emotional, or affectionate… So I guess I modeled my lack of romantic behavior after him. Plus, I used to think Valentine’s Day was a bunch of commercialized nonsense. A Hallmark greeting card holiday with overpriced roses, packed restaurants, and the pressure to be romantic just because it’s February 14th.

Linda and I have been married almost 23 years and… I’ll admit… most years I did the bare minimum, like grab some flowers at Walmart. But here’s what I’ve learned over the years- I had it all wrong.

I’m very thankful Linda doesn’t share her love for me on only one day of the year. She constantly finds wonderful little ways to show her love and appreciation for me. She knows my top love languages are gifts and touch, so she’s always bringing little gifts to me or special treats from the grocery store and giving me hugs. When I had toe surgery in January, she made me feel comfortable at night by removing my post-surgery shoe, carefully tucking me in bed, and kissing me goodnight.

My problem wasn’t Valentine’s Day itself—it was my mental mindset. Sometimes we get an idea stuck in our heads that has little basis in reality…. Like my treating Valentines Day as the only day I could be romantic. Like I could coast for 364 days and then make up for it with a box of chocolates and a card. My wife deserves better than that. And your wife or significant other deserves better than that too.

Several years ago, the Lord convicted me of my once-a-year thankfulness for my wonderful wife. That year I hand made a sign for our front yard that I left out for several weeks. This colorful sign proclaimed in big bold letters, “Everyday with Linda is Valentines Day.” And I attached two colorful balloons to draw more attention to it.

The best marriages aren’t built on one grand romantic gesture a year. They’re built on small, consistent daily acts of love. Valentine’s Day should be a continuation of what you’re already doing, not a scramble to compensate for what you’re not. I started realizing all the things Linda did for our household and began helping more—grocery shopping together, putting away groceries, cleaning up dishes after every meal, cleaning the bathrooms. While these aren’t grand gestures, they demonstrate my love, respect, and care for Linda daily.

I think about what Paul wrote in Ephesians 5:25 speaks to this: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” That’s not a once-a-year kind of love. That’s a sacrificial, daily kind of love. And it changes everything.

So, this February, instead of just marking Valentine’s Day on the calendar, what if you decided to make every day Valentine’s Day? What if you loved your wife (or significant other) with the same intentionality and passion you showed when you courted her? You could improve your marriage dramatically by demonstrating daily servant love…without expecting anything in return.

I know marriage takes work–consistent, intentional, sometimes uncomfortable work. But it’s worth it. Your wife is worth it. Your marriage is worth it.

So, this Valentine’s Day, I’m challenging you to step up your game. Don’t settle for flowers and candy. Instead, make a commitment to love your wife sacrificially every single day. Prioritize her needs over yours. Serve her sacrificially. Pray with her faithfully.

Make every day Valentine’s Day.

Because when you love your wife the way Christ loves the church—every day of the year—you’re not just building a better marriage. You’re reflecting God’s love to a world that desperately needs to see it.