“See the Table Sunday?” by Cynthia Gross

As the world is opening up again, we are starting to celebrate in person with family and friends. I’ve always been a big advocate for something I call “Set the Table Sunday,” which involves building relationships over the dining table.

When I grew up, the heart of our home was our kitchen table. It was a place where a lot of conversations, laughter, tears, and decisions were made. I believe through these moments, our family values were conveyed to us, whether we realized it or not. It was a place where my family gathered almost every day “to do life together.”

Throughout history, the dining table was always a place for bonding. People could have eaten anywhere, but they created the table to bond with others around the pleasure of dining. Being respectful by using table manners was a part of that event.

For some of us today, I think we have lost the understanding of how important dining together is to the health and well-being of our friends and families. Studies show that when children dine with their families, they have less depression. Studies also indicate that children who know their identity, i.e., who they are, also have less depression as well as other issues. I believe it is all connected.

The lessons we learn at the table help us throughout our lives. For example, when you teach your child to hold the fork correctly you are not just teaching the action of holding the fork, but rather you are teaching the attitude of self-respect and confidence. You are not teaching what to do, you are teaching how to be…it is much more important than you might imagine!

I encourage us to set the stage, by setting the table for bonding time with our friends and families. Show them they are of value by declaring it a cell free zone. Spend this time in personal space rather than cyberspace.

Whether we set a formal fun place setting using our good china or plastic plates, we show that everyone has a place at the table to connect, be present, feel valued and belong.

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